Work finally ended, but yea, maybe it's fatigue, or because of some stuff, lately, i hasn't been in the right mood. As usual, the bad temper, the attitude problem tat everyone has to bear, from my friends, to my family.

I don't know what to say, really. Besides feeling apologetic, i can't say much more. As usual, i've had my best-est friends around. Yea, they too have to bear with my bad temper everytime. Especially the two i had a talk with earlier tonight.

Like i said, life's more bearable when you have people around who listens to you and consistently give advice and suggestions to you. Really sorry for ranting non-stop. I know it sucks when you have a friend who constantly complains and whines.

But yea, thanks for being accomodating and still continue standing by till this moment. A phrase i've heard before : nothing is forever. Yea, i know that and i know my friendship with this friends can't be forever, cause i will die someday LOL. But i do hope that it'll be for life. Tyty peeps. I promise i'll definitely heed what you people say and i'll be back soon, real soon.

P.S : I dont know how to reject my "admirer" who refuses to let me off and keep thinking of me
;( (FP U KNOW WHO RIGHT HAHAHA )

Yours, Ray..4:49 AM

Random statement of the day :

Conflict's scary, really. Just a little more thinking, that's all.

Yours, Ray..9:08 PM

Life has been tiring, but unusually good. Hasn't had this kinda calm cool days for quite a period. Afterall whenever life's great, something terrible has to happen. Glad this time round nothing happened.

Too many ups and downs in life, too many. If time can stop at this period of time, i'll be happy, really. At least there isn't so much things that's messing my life now.

So many people i met since the beginning of poly till now. Some from the school itself, and some outside friends that i've grown close with.

Used to really drift away from a couple of old friends, but glad things' better now, at least to me. It really pays to make an effort by yourself, not always depending on other people. Guess it counts in any and every relationship.

Yup, that should be all for now. And then a phrase from a close friend, that is absolutely true. Nothing is forever, cherish the present.

I'm glad i did, or i guess i'll be full of regrets now, tyty =D

Yours, Ray..3:48 PM

Guess no one notice their own mistakes and faults till someone points it out. And it is even more obvious to yourself when someone did the same thing you always did.

And that's when you realise how terrible you'll feel if someone else does it. And that's exactly what you usually behave. Sry.

And, a lot of things some friends said were true. Guess i should really learn.

Yours, Ray..2:15 AM

Well, well, will upload photos another day. Let me do some updates of my thoughts for now.

I always ask myself whether i'm doing the right thing by putting in a lot into certain friendship. Probably because of a couple scary incidents that made me wonder about that. But i seriously don't regret doing that now. Because i realise a certain few individuals does the same too.

No doubt at times i try to give in a lot, but they too on their part put in a lot into the friendship. I have two really good example in my mind when i'm typing this. And i really appreciate it.

Yea, i know how sucky the past has been, but at least now i know, there's still some really good friends out there who made me realise that what i've done and behaved this whole while is not stupid and it is not a mistake.

And to a friend who reminded me something a while ago, don't worry, history shall not repeat. I know who deserve it and who does not. Thanks for the reminder. And you're also one of those who it will not happen on hahah.

Everyone has flaws and i admit i have a lot. Take for example the constant attitude problem that i have nowadays. Yea, and really, thanks a lot for accomodating with that. I know that really suck, and it's terrible to have someone who keeps giving attitude problem around.

And then, to a couple of people, thanks for constanting asking me out and involving me in things. Really sorry because the working schedule is quite fixed and thanks for asking =].

And thanks to the 'idiots' who always stupidly accompany me take mrt all the way to marina back just to let a stupid friend staying at choa chu kang get seat .

OK, things to be done before holiday ends.

1)Swimming ( u better wake up or u're gonna die )
2)Chalet
3)Changi beach club
4)Kbox x 2
5)Ice skating ( this time round we won't fall )

Yours, Ray..3:03 AM

This past few months in poly, i've had my ups and downs. Especially one particular issue. But i'm glad it happened really. Because it it through this problem that i got to know who are the true friends around me and who are the ones who stood by me over this period of time.

So i'll just say out the couple of people who i really like to thank here.

First will be the 3 gd friends who stood by me since the beginning of the problem. I think i owe you people an apology for the constant attitude problem and the never ending complaints. Thanks for being around, without the constant reminders and advices, i've no idea what i'll become. Not forgetting constantly trying to involve me when going out, or joke around and trying to cheer me up. I don't have to name the people out , cause it's pretty obvious.

Next will be one of my classmate and her outside friend. You're also one of the few who knows about my problem. Really appreciate the fact that you constantly asked me out. Though it's a little weird at the beginning, but i know you all are asking me out cause you people don't want me to ponder too much over the problem. OUTING THIS MONTH END ? =x

Ok, then it's the 11 years + and someone who owes us sakae sushi after work ~ Thanks for the advices and stuff. And most importantly, sorry for shining like a light tower LOL. I know you all are constantly trying to make me happy when i'm out ( ok i sound like a xiao hai zi ) and i appreciate it.

Afterwhich will be those who were directly involved. Sorry for causing so much trouble. Thanks for all the talks etc, I've learnt how to think now.

Last but not least will be a sec close friend. 4 years + of friendship ok. Guess you're one of the few past friends that i'll talk to about my problems and everything. We've both moved to different institutes now, but it's a good thing that we are still in contact. Thanks arh lass !

To the rest, thanks. I'm awake and feeling better than ever, and sorry for any forms of mood swings aaha. BYEEEEE.

Yours, Ray..1:32 AM

I guess i'm really starting to grow up already. I realise through this few months in poly till a few days ago, i've learnt a lot.

First of all, i've learnt how harsh reality can be. How tough life can be. But still you gotta move on with it. No matter how fcuk up you feel, you still need to get over with it.

And then a few days ago, someone close reminded me again. She reminded me about not letting my history to repeat itself. I was a little positive at the beginning and thought nothing of it. But after a little more thoughts and after somethings, i feel that partly what she said is right. In the sense that at times i get a little over.

Perhaps it is through this lessons, through this period of time that i realise a change is needed. Nah, i aint thinking too much.

There's much more to say, but yea, shall not blog much more about it. Today is a step towards changing, a step towards a new life, let's just hope i'll persevere through it and not give in to my old character once again..

Yours, Ray..3:12 AM